Life is but a puzzle we try to put together…

Piece 1: You Are Here

The new year brings a refreshing new start. It’s like a beautiful blank piece of paper with endless possibilities. For our church that new start comes in the form of a ‘restart.’ We discussed the idea of hitting the ‘restart’ button which included a dialogue about figuring out where you are. It was a pretty vivid visual for me. If I am hiking somewhere and wanna find the top of the mountain I first need look at a map. I need to find where I want to go, where I am and THEN I can determine the best route to take. If I have no idea where I am or cannot find that lovely ‘you are here’ pin then how can I possibly navigate myself to where I want to go? Apply this to your faith journey. If you don’t know where you are how can you find the path? So, we all took this survey asking us various questions to help us take a personal inventory on where we are and help locate ourselves if you will. For me it was like a splash of cold water on my face that was much needed. I was sort of stuck but didn’t realize it. I also didn’t really want to face the fact that I wasn’t opening the Bible enough.

Next came excuses. I never read anymore. As a mom of 8 I am on the go from the minute either a child or my alarm goes of until the kids go to bed. And then some. I have tried to read during the day. Forced myself to sit down at 1pm every day and try to read. Yup, that ended with a nap of sorts which isn’t helpful for anyone in my home. I tried reading before bed, same thing. I decided I needed to change the bucket. Rather than find time to read I found the time to be read to. I opened up the YouTube app on my iphone and searched “dramatic reading of the Bible.” So for the past 4-5 weeks I have been listening to the Bible every day. I just put my phone in my pocket and go about my daily chores listening when I can and pausing when things pop up. I cleaned the kitchen while listening to Genesis, folded laundry to listening to Leviticus, and even listen in the car with the kids. I listen when I can a little each day with no pressure to go faster than I can handle. It’s been interesting to be reminded we are all human, we make mistakes and families are messy-even biblical families. I am enjoying this method of ‘opening’ the Bible daily.

Piece 2: A Word and a Dream

As a mom of little ones I don’t usually get a lot of sleep. Even when I do get a nice bout of sleep it’s usually light sleep and I wake easily. I don’t remember dreams often and sometimes wonder if I even have time for dreams with such little sleep. So when I recently woke up with not memory of a dream, it was VERY vivid and even strange. We were in our van with my husband was driving and the kids in the back. We were navigating road and road filled with twists, turns and crazy construction. At one point I recall looking at my husband thinking “Thank goodness he’s driving because I couldn’t do this!” You see at that moment we were driving straight up a ridiculously steep hill that was filled with construction and we couldn’t see the other side of the slope. I was terrified we wouldn’t make it but he floored and up we went.

I woke up at that moment with the word “Logos” as if it was written on my forehead. At first I thought maybe I was just wrong and it was Legos…after all so many of my boys play Legos. I let it sit for a bit and couldn’t kick Logos. I didn’t know what the word meant and just felt I had to look it up. At that moment the day started and I figured I would look it up later. While in the van with my family I was reminded of the dream and told my husband all about it. He smiled and asked me if I wanted to know what “Logos” means. He said, “it’s Greek for the word.”

Putting the Pieces Together

I am not one to always understand my dreams, I certainly don’t understand all of the Bible but I did feel that this was God’s way of telling me to continue to listen to the Bible and trust in the path is has laid out for me. As a type A control freak letting go isn’t my strong suit but somehow He seems to find subtle ways to remind me to keep on keeping on. It’s was certainly a nice feeling to have a couple pieces put together. 🙂

If you are looking for a nice audio version of The Bible I also like The Story which is available in a variety of places but I have enjoyed it on youtube here: https://youtu.be/MBc9CCi9XGU


I’m Not Superwoman

The human body is amazing. We ask so much of our bodies forcing it to do so many things…even when our minds tell us we have reached our limits we manage to push beyond that point. Personally I have asked my body to do plenty. I have asked it to be athletic in high school & college for cheer team. Hours of tumbling, stunting, dancing, lifting weights, running, etc. I have asked it to be a flexible and strong not once, not twice, but SEVEN times to carry and deliver my babies. Months of crazy changes inside & out gaining and loosing roughly 70lbs each time. I have asked it to be active for the past 10 years doing sprint triathlons & runs. Swimming, biking, running sometimes pregnant, sometimes not and sometimes so post baby I had to hurry to the finish line to nurse my baby. I have asked it to feed my babies on and off for the past 13 years. Months and months of refueling to produce milk & feed my babies.

Body Changes with Baby #5

Body Changes with Baby #5

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5 Months Post Baby #5

None of this makes me a superhero. It doesn’t even make me supermom. It makes me human.

I have asked it to do so much and always bounces back. How? I move. I’m active with my kids. Being a mom of so many kids I just don’t have time for the gym. I run when I can. I am active with the kids. I push a double stroller up a hill once or twice a day. I pull a bike trailer with kids in it….No magic pill. No special drink. No special diet. No specific program. No gym membership. I just make the effort to be as active as I can.

Body Changes with Baby #6

Body Changes with Baby #6

After baby #2 I started running and competing in sprint tri’s. Since then I have done about 4-5 sprint tri’s each summer and a few 5k races each year. People ask me how I train for these races and I am somewhat embarrassed to admit my response each time is, “I don’t.” It’s the truth. I don’t really train.  I add, “I have kids so I am pretty busy chasing them around. I stay as active as I can.” Honestly, I just do the races with the goal of finishing and of course have fun. It’s not always easy but it can be done. With God, all things are possible. I believe so deeply in this that I completed my first 1/2 marathon while 27 weeks pregnant with baby #7. It was hard. SO hard! I ran when I could and walked when I couldn’t run. The last 2 miles were the most challenging miles I have ever walked in my life. It was all worth it (It was for Team WorldVision). My wonderful hubby was with me every step of the way (ok, so not every step…he took a few of bathroom stops :0). Needless to say I was a sobbing mess of hormones at the finish line so happy to have finished.

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Half-Marathon with Baby #7

By body will never again look like it did in my early 20’s and I am okay with that. I have earned plenty of stripes (stretch marks) and have cellulite but feel very thankful my body has been able to carry my babes.

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Amazing Belly Tricks with Baby #6

I am currently beyond the 5 month mark with Baby #7 and am not yet back to my pre-baby weight but I am not worried as I am still nursing. I’ll get there.

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Pre Baby #7 & 22 Weeks along with Baby #7

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39 Weeks and 2 days with Baby #7 & 4 Weeks Post-Baby #7

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Body Changes with Baby #5

I’m no poster-child for athletes and am certainly no fitness guru. I’m still a rookie when it comes to ALL races. I am just a mom who stays active. I pray my being active helps to teach my children to be active as well.

For any of you out there who struggle to be active and stay active, keep at it! Just get up and move. Walk, jog, run, roll. Whatever you like to do. If you don’t like it you won’t do it so pick something you enjoy. If you like to walk, then walk! If you like to bike, bike. If  rollarblading is more your style then do that. Just get out there and be active.

For with God nothing shall be impossible.-Luke 1:37

 

 

Reflections of life…

Being a Mom of many when I go places I do head count, after head count, after head count. Trying to keep my ducks in a row isn’t always easy but I love it. So when we get in the truck to go anywhere I typically do a roll call but it’s really turned into more of a fun thing for the kids. You see our 4 year old can’t just say ‘Here!’ or ‘What?’ like the others. When his names is called instead he has to let us know that his little brother is here, “Peter is here!!” Reflections

One lovely day while we were heading out to grocery shop I did my normal count and roll and briefly looked in the mirror one more time. As I glanced back I saw their beautiful smiling faces. For a moment, all happy and smiling. I immediately thanked God for each of those blessings he has entrusted me with.

I couldn’t get over the reflection in the mirror. It seemed like yesterday I was glancing in the mirror to check my lipstick or make sure my hair was ok. Just one face, me. When I glance in the mirror now I still see part of me but I see so much more. Seeing part of my face yet all of their faces. It’s still me, just a different me. I see me in each of my children and I see me with them.

I feel so blessed even if they aren’t always happy and smiling. I like reflection I now see. It’s bigger than just me.

Things I used to do…

This morning while I was getting ready… (you know, putting my contact in while standing on one leg because the other leg is propping open a drawer of brushes and such which the 10 month old is playing in. If I move my leg he’d most certainly shut his little chubby fingers in the drawer). He decided to venture into another drawer and discovered my stash of fingernail polish which got me thinking. (After I put them all away of course) Painting my nails was something I used to do. Now they are ridiculously short and never painted unless it’s an event which involves a formal invitation.

Things I did BK (before kids)…in no particular order

  • Paint my nails
  • Fuss with my hair
  • Read for enjoyment ( I read but not very often and never finish a book)
  • Shower with out peeking out every few seconds like it’s a race
  • Sleep alone with my hubby (It’s inevitable that one of them will come crawl into our bed at night)
  • Sleep 8 hours
  • Go to work without baby spit up, goobers or other ‘token of appreciation’ I recieve from my babies
  • Wear a bikini proudly (not that ALL of my stretch marks are strips of honor I have earned 5 times over)
  • Train for the Tri’s I do every season (Yeah, I am an idiot not an athlete….pushing strollers, pulling the bike trailer…not real training)
  • Treat myself to mani’s and pedi’s
  • Get my hair cut regularly (scheduling such things is next to impossible…just too crazy for me I gave up so yes, my hair is getting long)
  • Buy salon products
  • Order food for myself when eating out (Now I just eat what the kids don’t finish…)
  • Carry a small purse
  • Watch TV/Movies
  • Date nights with my hubby
  • Enjoy shopping (I avoid the mall at all costs now)
  • spend $ on myself (I would much rather see the kids enjoy things or provide them with something they need than buy something I want)

It’s not to say that I will never do these things again. I will some day. Don’t get me wrong I am not complaining. I love being a Mommy and wouldn’t trade it for the world. They are little now and when they are older I’m sure I’ll do some of these things again. Who knows what the future holds…For now I’ll just laugh at the things I did when I had more time to myself and enjoy the giggles, grins and silly times with my 5 crazy kiddos.

What is on your list of things you did BK? 🙂

Board Games, Poker & Purpose

From the title of this post you can tell I have children who love to play games but then again don’t we all? Even when young children like to play games. Whether it’s memory, words with friends, or poker – games are fun and a great way to learn all kinds of things. Young or old we all play games and learn new ones. When learning a new game where do we start? Directions of course. You read the directions or someone else may explain them to you. We all want to know how to win the game. Put another way-what is the purpose of playing the game?

You may or may not have played the game LIFE and most likely read the directions. We are all a part of a much bigger game of life which really doesn’t come with a set of directions. In fact many people are constantly seeking to discover their own purpose. Why do we do what we do?

As a mother of 5 I am no stranger to questions of why and can honestly say that I try to give my children answers to their questions rather than the “because I said so” line which we have all heard. As a teacher I heard the same questions only applied to different items. Rather than, “Why is the sky blue?” I heard things like, “Why do I have to learn this?” And sometimes when testing time comes around, “Why do I bother reading the questions if I don’t even know the answers?”

Students are no different than us-they want to have a purpose. They may ask “Why do I have to do this assignment?” Is the purpose to this assignment to put a score in a little square in a gradebook? Not very motivating in my mind. There should be a bit more contextual information provided here. How about finding out what that student would like to do with their life? Once you know that one you can work backwards to find more purpose in their path towards that goal. (Increasing student engagement through relevancy and corresponding hope as well)

In their educational journey students have many ‘why’ questions. I think if we explored these questions a bit more we could really change what is happening at both the classroom level and the policy level.

High-stakes, standardized tests-Why? Memorizing dates, facts, etc.-Why? 7-period days/block scheduling-Why? Requiring all students to take certain classes-Why? Building schools with square classrooms, boards in the front, student desks in rows-Why? (We already know the history behind the factory model of education-but again begin the dialogue.)

If we start addressing students (and parents) ‘why’ questions we may start a dialogue to get to the bottom of these questions and possibly even ask a new question. Why not change it???

My Life at 100mp

While talking with a few friends recently the statement: “There is no grass growing under your feet” was directed at me. I laughed and said, “No.” I really didn’t think much of it at the time but as I was driving home I pondered how fast-pasted my life really is. Why it is that way and how in the world I keep up with the break-neck pace.

My husband and I have ALWAYS lived our lives (or at least our life together) at 100mph. We seemed to have taken the multi-tasking idea to another level, either that or we are practically nuts and want to test the limits of our sanity. We’ve never really done things one at a time. Maybe that is where I get my “go big or go home” attitude….so does that mean I can blame the craziness on my husband then? LOL. Nah, I have always subscribed to the philosophy of “why put off tomorrow what you can do today.” Abe Lincoln I think….

So back to the topic of this post. Why so fast? Not really sure. Why just get married or just graduate? Why not graduate, get married, fix-up a house and have a baby all at the same time? Probably because it IS as challenging as it sounds. Every year when I compose our annual Christmas letter we reflect upon the past year’s events and it always seems like a crazy amount. I guess we have become accustomed to it. In the past 10 years: 5 moves, 3 college degrees, 4 babies, 2 homes built, numerous jobs, races, triathlons, and of course the many activities of the children. Yeesh!

Somehow in there we manage to squeeze in family time, church, family bible time, time for hobbies (golf, scrapping, photography, sewing, running, rollerblading, biking, fast-pitch). How we do it all is beyond me. Well, I guess I might have at least a clue.

  1. Faith. I have faith in myelf, my husband and our family. With God all things are possible. There is no task to large to tackle.
  2. Less sleep. I never sleep-in like in my early 20’s and don’t have time for naps.
  3. Lists. Who doesn’t love lists..ok, so maybe just me. But writing it down makes me feel soo much more at-ease and organized about it all. (And who doesn’t love crossing things out on a to do list???)
  4. Motivation & Persistence. Having the motivation to get started and the persistence to keep it going is imperative.
  5. Realistic expectations. Being realistic about our expectations for taking on such crazy tasks. We understand and accept we cannot do it all or at least not all in one day. (I admit that I have the supermom or superwoman complex. I prefer to do it myself rather than ask for help but knowing that there is help and being able to ask for it is a good plan and something I am working on.)

My grandmother who walked very fast even at the end of her years said she did so because she was afraid she’d tip over if she slowed down. That may be the same for me. If I slow down I may nap, fall asleep and miss the life I have been blessed with.

I plan to continue to keep running after my dreams, chasing my giggling children, walking hand-in-hand with my husband and doing everything I can do still get the daily chores done.

So Yes, grass doesn’t grow under these feet and I wouldn’t have it any other way.